The dating years are really fun, but equally confusing. One of the most confusing situations is when you try to determine whether or not someone is interested in getting to know you better, or just being polite or passing the time.

Actually, it’s usually confusing because the people involved are confused. Attraction comes in stages. You see something you like and you want to dig a little deeper. If you keep seeing things you like, the attraction grows and vice versa. The guy/girl across from you doesn’t know if she’s interested in you or not, but he/she knows if they want to know more.

Here are a few tricks to put in your toolkit to see if a person is actually interested in getting to know you better or not.

  • Obviously, smiling is an easy indicator. No matter what they’re saying, if there’s an honest smile on their faces, they’re interested. Watch out for people who hide sarcastic smiles well, though.
  • If they compliment you on something, they’re interested. It’s highly unusual for people to compliment you without having ulterior motives. Yes, you might have a fantastic shirt on, but they’re already aware of that. If they take the time to let you know that, they’re testing the waters – trying to see a little more of you.
  • If they agree with you, or if they disagree and laugh, they’re into you. The more talkative, the more interested. If they aren’t, they’ll just “uh-huh” you until you give up.
  • If they touch you during conversation, they’re interested. If they don’t they just might be shy or reserved. You can test this by reaching for something near them and watching to see if they let you touch them or if they shrink back when you get too close.
  • If you’ve been getting mixed signals, try leaving. Tell them you need to use the bathroom or go get a drink or something. If they’re waiting for you when you get back, they’re probably interested.

Of course, these are just some general suggestions.  Every situation, every person is different, so don’t rely on these authoritatively.  Use your instincts and some common sense.  And always try to leave with a good impression.  You never know when it will come back to you.